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科学家发现新元素
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既然挑战别人翻译，不妨自己也试一试，算是与科学网读者春节联欢，祝大家新春快乐。
一个主要研究机构最近宣布，科学家发现了迄今已知的最钝密的新元素，并把它命名为Bushcronium，元素符号为Wb [原文为W，但元素符号W已经给了钨，所以这里改用Wb。鉴于新元素的中文名通常要新造，所以建议用下面这个字（发音同钚）]：
Wb由1个中子、12个副中子、75个助理中子、以及223个副助理中子组成，原子量为311。这些粒子靠被称为傻子的暗力约束在一起，傻子周围环绕着大量的名为卒子的类轻子。
因为Wb原子里的傻子与大气中的各种元素随机相互作用、变成副助理中子，所以Wb的质量随时间而增加，形成同位素。这种傻子晋升特征致使一些科学家提出一个假设：只要傻子的浓度超过某个域值，就能自发形成Wb。这个假设域值被称为临界傻质。
在钱的催化下，Wb能激活Foxnewsium(暂时还没有中文名，建议元素符号Fx)，后者能辐射比其它元素高几个数量级的能量，虽然是以非相干噪音的形式，因为Fx的卒子数只有Wb的一半，而其傻子数是却Wb的两倍。
原文见下。几个相差不大的版本已在网上流传多年，不知道出自何处。在一个版本中，新元素的名称是Administratium。
A major research institute has just announced the discovery of the densest element yet known to science. The new element has been named "Bushcronium." Bushcronium has one neutron, 12 deputy neutrons, 75 assistant neutrons, and 223 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 311. These particles are held together by dark forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. The symbol for Bushcronium is "W".
Bushcronium's mass actually increases over time, as morons randomly interact with various elements in the atmosphere and become assistant deputy neutrons in a Bushcronium atom, forming isotopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to believe that Bushcronium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass".
When catalyzed with money, Bushcronium activates Foxnewsium, an element that radiates orders of magnitude more energy, albeit as incoherent noise, since it has 1/2 as many peons but twice as many morons.
https://wap.sciencenet.cn/blog-714-15271.html
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